Hello dear hearts
My thirty-third birthday is today! Here are the final eleven of the thirty-three things learned, pondered, remembered, and experienced this last year.
23. The Paddywax Apothecary Tobacco & Patchouli candle is my favorite candle of all time. It smells the way I imagine all old secret libraries I read about in my dark academia books.
24. I get second hand embarrassment so badly. And I get it the most by watching or reading fictional characters. I will absolutely skip or mute awkward scenes because it causes actual discomfort. Small amounts of awkward embarrassment is okay, but when it drags out and there is no escape for that character. I cannot handle it. And if this happens in real life, I usually have an internal anxiety attack until it is resolved or I can walk away.
25. Gaming is so hard for me. Video games, table top games, card games, literally anything. I get so stuck on rules, I get nervous when people teach me and have to wait on me, I get anxious and worried about doing it right. Games are not relaxing for me at all and I so deeply wish they were. They are another form of storytelling and connecting with people, but the amount of stress it involves. Alas. I cannot.
26. Texas pecan coffee is my favorite coffee.
27. There are days I deeply wish I would have stayed in the theater world after high school. I miss doing musicals, I miss being back stage, I miss the feel of opening nights, I miss reading scripts. Ah. Maybe one day I’ll get back into a community theater.
28. This year’s top three romance tropes are forced proximity, age gap, and bi-awakening. This year’s top three fantasy tropes are enchanted/secret libraries, magical tattoos, and fated platonic soulmates. This year’s top three fanfic ships (aside from my Ineffable Spouses): Steddie (Steve and Eddie from Stranger Things), Steddyhands (Stede, Ed, and Izzy from Our Flag Means Death), and Sterek (Stiles and Derek from Teen Wolf).
29. When I get super numb and dissociated and know that need a good cry, I purposely watch heartbreaking movies to snap me out of it.
30. Writing about myself in the third person sometimes helps me figure out what my next steps are. It’s a journal practice that I once read somewhere, that it allows you to almost step outside of yourself and your inner critic, to give yourself a different perspective on a situation. I don’t do it too often, but when I do, it is incredibly helpful.
31. Oh wait, I lied! Word games. I like word games. Scrabble is fun and crosswords are fun! Do those count? And I play Wordscapes on my phone.
32. Once my mom asked me what I wanted to be a when I grew up and I told her “a professional student”. That’s still accurate, to be honest. I love learning. I will never be done learning. And I truly love it. (As long as there are no grades, thank you.)
33. My tarot card for the new year is: The Star. I’m going to keep my interpretation of this to myself. But happy birthday to me.
x
Ash
the star!! what a lovely card! 🖤 HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! 🎉🎉🎉
Happy Birthday Ashley! The Star is the perfect card🩷