One day, my ex-husband and I were talking about why we loved each other and he said (I’m paraphrasing, this was back in 2011) that the things he loved about me he would still love even if I were a man.
At first I was confused, and I got upset too although I can’t remember the specifics. But then he explained it a little more and realized that it was my personality, my brain, all the inside pieces that he loved. That it didn’t matter what parts I was born with.
And it dawned on me a few years ago that my ex-husband and I had a pretty queer marriage and I wish I would have known that.
We really didn’t fall into a lot of stereotypical gender roles or heteronormative behaviors — the biggest things that stick out when I think about it how we frequently talked about the attractiveness of other people no matter the gender, how we talked about our previous crushes/relationships, and we had our friendships with other people that were also prioritized, not just our relationship.
People often ask if I regret getting married and truthfully, no. I never regret it. I DO wish I would have understood queerness more, understood my asexuality more, and that I had a better grasp on my mental health back then.
But had I not gotten married when I did and to the person I did, I would not be the person I am today.
that's so beautiful. 🖤
💕💕💕💕 that’s amazing