Evolution of Queerness
In the most generalized, non-specific way
I don’t know how to write about the thing I want to talk about today. I don’t have enough research or learning on the topic, so I will likely write about this imperfectly and possibly offend or disappoint people.
But I’m going to try my best to not do so.
I keep thinking of the evolution of queerness, the evolution of our labels and identities, specifically here in America, as I can’t speak for anywhere else. But also specifically those of us who were not able to keep our ancestral words and traditions alive due to colonization and Christian supremacy.
Because queerness has always existed. And maybe labels weren’t as important in early human years? But we love to have words that have meaning that give us validation to our experience, and nothing is wrong with that. So evolution of queerness, identity, etc. happened. And it helped us find each other. Helped us survive (though many of us also didn’t).
But now I also think of how frustrated I get with the microlabels, with having to validate my existence with every “queer” behavior. I wonder if in the future, possibly after I am gone from this world, if microlabels will be around. Or if humanity will come back around to we are who we are and we love who we love and we are family with those that we say are our family.
Please feel free to share any books or references that I should study on this because I’m feeling super disconnected and frustrated with myself lately.
For me, the word ‘queer’ is for the world at large (I don’t need to explain the details of my gender and sexuality to everyone, just know that I’m some version of queer and that that’s enough). My micro-labels are for me and a select few whom I trust a) to see me as I am, and not as they wish or imagine me to be, and b) not to judge me if/when those micro-labels evolve with further understanding and evolution of myself. I think our labels will come and go as all language does, but any label is useful in the now, if it gives us meaning and helps us find our community.
I agree. I feel like microlabels have provided connection, or validation for some people, especially when your experiences are outside of the common, even as a queer person. I think that finding a word can be deeply useful when you’re learning about yourself. I think sometimes microlabels can even be reactionary because comphet gaslights many queers for so long, I’ve seen microlabels used almost like a talisman against this gaslighting.
I, too, hope one that one day we collectively get to a point where we are who are and we love who love and the process of sharing that or having it acknowledged in community is a conversation of invited intimacy where we share what our queerness means for us. When the shape, space, and actions of our queerness get to be held and validated and allowed to grow and shift and be explored-first by ourselves to ourselves and then to and in the communities we belong to.