Disjointed Springtime Thoughts
and a few things from this week
Hello dear hearts
It rained last night. And it will probably rain again today and tomorrow.
I am hopeful it is the Spring rain, not the Winter rain. There is a difference and I wish I could describe it, but it’s hard to explain if you don’t live where there are distinct seasons.
The best I can explain is Spring rain is like drinking water at the gym when you’re mid-work out and Winter rain is like being smacked in the face with ice cubes when you tip your glass too far and then spill cold water down your shirt.
And Spring rain brings more Spring feelings which is improving my mood significantly.
While I am not in the same dissociated phase as last week, I do still feel Something Off. My patience is very thin. The things I can normally brush off give me extra anxiety and frustration. I’m thankful that right now I have been able to up my therapy to weekly instead of every other week.
Fingers crossed the Spring energy keeps me on the Up.
About This Week
Rediscovered the joy of honey in coffee. I’ve been using almond creamer for so long that I stopped using honey — that’s probably why my allergies started getting bad again, oops — but now I’m back to my honey just in time for spring time.
I forgot how it feels to not get enough deep sleep when you’re responsible for toddlers overnight. Luckily, I have the support to nap during the day to make up for it.
That new book smell.
In need of a pistachio latte whilst sitting in a café in a cozy little corner.
Um, I think I heard a mouse or other small critter in the ceiling. No thank you, please. I am not Cinderella, I do not wish to discuss my dreams with you.
I accidently opened an Amazon link to a gay dark mafia romance while still signed into my mom’s Prime account. Sorry Mom for anything that Amazon now suggests to you, lolsob.
Why are toddlers?
Back On My Blog-shit
On Wednesday I refreshed my blog — again.
Which is a separate feel from this Substack. I go through periods of indecision about my blog and whether it still serves a purpose since blog reading seems to be dead. But I wanted somewhere to keep and share my fiction writing.
So all my fiction writings will be there. Mostly in vignettes style — currently there are only five — and this time I am really not trying to stick to a schedule otherwise I will panic and then stop writing all together.
The genres will range from contemporary fantasy to romance adjacent to paranormal to cozy fantasy to gothic horror. All queer even if it doesn’t seem specifically stated. All my characters are queer.
There is a serial flash fiction I have about 1,800 words for. It’s what the most recent vignette is from. Sibling banter, wolfish familiars, contemporary fantasy world, probably something haunted, 100% queer cast.
It’s such a bizarre experience to re-read the draft of this letter and then experiencing the final touches. For context, I started this letter on Wednesday and am finishing it shortly before 10 AM on Sunday morning. My writing energy always feels so disjointed when I do it this way — but squeezing time in to write this week has been hard.
My current low energy is do to two very interrupted nights of sleep due to the kiddo. But at the same time, have this spare reserve of energy to do All The Things?
For now, I’ll just go drink this coffee, it’s still my first cup and I’ve only had one sip.
Until next time,
-Ash